Juuuuuune.

So, it seems I have not posted in awhile. I need to change a few things on here haha, seeing as my last name isn't Vallie. It's Gibson. I shall fix that after my post. So..in summation, yeah, I got married(: yay. I got a puppy the other day, Bailey. I've got myself going back to the gym. Quit my job. Still going to school however. Blehhh. I wanna be with my husband. Anyhow.

Here's Bailey:

Bailey I picked up on Sunday. She's an Aussie mix, about three months old. Total fur ball. Poor dog was just dumped in some neighbors yard. The lack of considerence from owners nowadays is strictly appalling. How can you just dump a puppy? Get a life right? Anyways, she's got her first puppy shots. And I've got an appointment to spay her at the end of the month. She's going to be upset. I feel like she needs a bandana. Other than that Hunt and  I are searching for a home with acreage in Northern CA. And it looks like our orders to Italy are near set. Excitement!(:

Saturday and work.

So tomorrow I leave for San Diego(: yay! I've got work today until four and then work tomorrow until noon. My flight leaves at 2:25. I'm stuck in San Fran for three hours and then on my way to San Diego..which I supposed to arrive at 7:40. Then tomorrow's the big day. This is going to be an interesting week.

I need to work on my homework this week for my Child Development, California Geography and Pharmacy Tech.

SUNDAY.

Go(:

I just don't know right now.

Of all the things I've put up with in my life I quite honestly can't tell you why I'm putting up with this. Maybe it has to do with the fact that I truly love and want to be with Hunt. Actually..that is why I'm dealing with this..because I do love him..more than he probably can fathom and understand. This past week has been the most stressful I have ever faced and it's making me physically sick. 

What did I do to deserve this?

I'm not a bad person and when I begin to judge someone it surely is not based on their beliefs but on their character as a person. And I feel like I'm being judged for something I surely did not do. In fact, I didn't do anything at all other than stick up for my beliefs and what I presume is the belief of the person I care about. And what do I get?

"How dare you try to tell me about my son as if I don't know anything about him."

Nowhere in what I had wrote had I told her that she doesn't know anything about her son. I look at that statement and think this: defense tactic to make me feel wrong. I'm not wrong. I know what is right and what is wrong and I was raised by the right parents to ALWAYS stand by what I feel is the correct and right decision for me. When you decide to marry someone you are faced with that fact that after you say "I do," it is no longer about you. I becomes we, me becomes us. You can no longer allow yourself the "selfish" thoughts of an individual but now must have the collective mind of a spouse deciding what is right for the both of us.

I just don't know what is right, what is wrong?

I know baby, but I do. Lying isn't right. It's a clear disrespect. One lie can evolve so easily into several that it's devistating. I've always been a say it how it is, stick to my guns type of girl and I will never change that. I will never cow down to someone to make them "feel" better. I will also stay on that path of right and wrong and live by it because I know in my heart that if I don't, I will only be preparing myself for so much hurt. I can't deal with stress right now in my current situation, I have a job, I have school and I have a social life. When I'm stressed it shows in my actions. I'm more often having to snap back into reality because I'm thinking so much it can be taken as I'm daydreaming when I'm not. I'm just trying to understand how a set of parents, who claim divine right, can be so selfish in their thinking to believe that they honestly know what is best for their son when they haven't even given me the time of day to prove that I am right. But at this point in my thinking I know..I will never be right for him in their eyes. They will always hate me. They will always blame me. They will lie about me. They will twist things about me. They will make me the bitch.

And I can't do a damn thing about it.

What do I say? This isn't me. I am not those things but I have nothing to prove to a selfish couple. I know who I am. My family knows who I am. And I know, you know who I am. I told you after yesterday that we would no longer talk about this, and we wont. This is me venting, instead of to you, but to the whole world. After Tuesday I could see what was happening. Our conversations were being consumed by our situation. I was crying. I was so brutally hurt by what had happened that I couldn't even stop myself from thinking about it. Your family will never like me and after yesterday, after right now, I don't care. But I will not let our conversations become them when our lives are about us and the family we will later have. I've already taken what I feel is the correct route to avoid an improper situation.

• We wont talk about it.
• My Facebook information, along with my MySpace information is set to "friends only."
• If I'm provoked, I will not react.
• If I am written, or spoken to, I will not respond.

I've done those things. That's really all I can do. I will continue to tell you however that I love you, I care about you. It's unconditional and no matter what I will be by your side. This is our life to live.

And I will be happy with it.

Monday, March 8, 2010.

So..in one week I will be married. Holy Jesus.

YAY(:

I don't think I did good on my California Geography test. I should've studied more. And I still have to do two projectsD: I also need to do my Child Development work. I hate homework, really. I'm hungry.

Spring Break..hurry up. Now.