Mm. Change.

So it seems his deployment has changed to the 20th. It hasn't hit me entirely yet that he's leaving. I'm pretty sure it will that final phone call we have where I will undoubtedly cry my eyes out begging him not to go. And of course..he will feel like ABSOLUTE CRAP. FML. Yeah..this definitely is going to suck. I honestly don't know what I'll do with myself. I'm so used to constant contact. Those days after when I don't know when I'll talk to him..I mean what the hell am I supposed to do? Nobody prepares you for this kind of stuff. I found a song I haven't heard in awhile today that entirely explained my feelings for him. Edwin McCain "I Could Not Ask For More" I'm sure you all have heard it. Talented artist. His other song "I'll Be" is great too.

It gets odd when I just look at things and go into a sort of daze where I start thinking about him. Bad enough he's on the other side of the States. Worse off he'll be on an entirely different continent by weeks end. I guess what makes that harder is communication. It wont be all day..all the time. It'll be whenever he's allowed and has time. Then there's the fact that no..he can't come home when he would like. I mean, no, he can't when he'd like right now but at least he's closer. I don't even possibly know how to explain that. 2800 miles is hard enough. Now add an entire ocean and then some.
This is horrible.